It wouldn't happen to begin with. I wouldn't let it.
[It's instinctive to say, habitual to promise. Naturally, Leo wouldn't let anything happen to his brother. Not after what happened to Raph, he won't let any of them get hurt again. But with not having everyone here in an unfamiliar place, the moment passes and he gets his breath.
There's no guarantee here. All he can do is his best. But the thought of Raph and Pops' disappointed faces if they found out they had the option to help and didn't do anything...]
Yeah, I know you don't know. [points chopsticks at] You can't make that promise or any others for that matter, and neither can I. So until we have at least some powers, weapons, something? Moratorium on heroics.
We lived thirteen clandestine years without almost getting killed by psychopaths on the regular, and you can't figure out how to occupy yourself for a couple months?
So adapt! What, you got bit by the heroism bug and now you have to find a new altar to throw yourself onto every other week?! [UGH. appetite gone, puts down bowl so hard it sloshes a bit.]
I don't care about what happens to them, I care about what happens to you! [throws down the cleaning rag he'd just picked up, kicking aside the part he'd had before] What if you died, Leo?!
What if you died? [reaches out to shove his brother's shoulder, hard, other hand on his chest as he tries to- tries to calm himself down, maybe. the bubbling, sour terror that'd gripped him the day before rises back up in his throat like bile, makes his sinuses run, his eyes water.] Don't you care what'd that do to us if you died?
[He's ready to argue back, a retort right on the tip of his tongue. But then he sees his brother's face, hears it in his voice. Donnie's hand shoving him finds Leo's skin dry and in need of a good soak from the heat and smoke the day before.
He waits a minute for Donnie to be done. Then carefully sits up, never taking his eyes off his twin.
He'd already done this to them once, hadn't he? He focuses so his voice doesn't come out as frenetic and frustrated as it had a minute ago.]
Of course I care. Why do you think I came back here with you instead of running in to help everyone else?
So- then why do you keep fighting me on this? [sits back down, angrily rubs the heel of his palm against his eyes to remove any lingering moisture. embarrassing. just because of some- some weird chest pain, or something.]
[cautiously looks up at his brother again. he hadn't expected that, not really. he hasn't exactly been fair to leo either; demanding honesty, demanding patience without offering his own concerns beyond "i don't want us dead," which is a given.
but there's just. something in the way; not pride. no, maybe-]
...I know...you're good. We all know it. You're not Raph, but you don't need to be. [rubs at his eye again, though at least it seems like that humiliating leaking has stopped for now. god, he hates this so damn much. his emotions always just come in this irritatingly incoherent bursts instead of just. flowing like normal, like how mikey does it. it makes it so hard to explain himself without some kind of soul-crushing event first.] I'm not worried about you. I'm worried about you worrying about me.
[oh.
it's shame.] I don't have the Donnie Pods. I don't have my lab, any of my tech, any powers...I don't even have my battle shell. I know if something happens to you, it'll be because you're... [sigh.] Because you're looking out for me.
[To his credit, Leonardo does listen. How much he retains will be up for debate here momentarily, but he focuses and listens. Clenches one hand into a fist on his lap before he loosens it again, more just... something to do that doesn't seem like he's distracting himself.
When Donnie's done, Leonardo watches his face before simply stretching out and laying his legs over his brother's, like Donnie's entire lap is a nice leg pillow.]
I'm going to be looking out for you regardless of whatever we have or don't have available. I'm the older brother, and it's just us, so I'm gonna.
The role does not exist because we are not twins, have no way of telling our actual ages, and even if we did it is I who is undoubtedly older because I was taller than you for how many years?
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[It's instinctive to say, habitual to promise. Naturally, Leo wouldn't let anything happen to his brother. Not after what happened to Raph, he won't let any of them get hurt again. But with not having everyone here in an unfamiliar place, the moment passes and he gets his breath.
There's no guarantee here. All he can do is his best. But the thought of Raph and Pops' disappointed faces if they found out they had the option to help and didn't do anything...]
I dunno, Dee.
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It's not our home but it is their home and maybe we should try to help out while we're stuck here!
1/3
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What if you died? [reaches out to shove his brother's shoulder, hard, other hand on his chest as he tries to- tries to calm himself down, maybe. the bubbling, sour terror that'd gripped him the day before rises back up in his throat like bile, makes his sinuses run, his eyes water.] Don't you care what'd that do to us if you died?
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He waits a minute for Donnie to be done. Then carefully sits up, never taking his eyes off his twin.
He'd already done this to them once, hadn't he? He focuses so his voice doesn't come out as frenetic and frustrated as it had a minute ago.]
Of course I care. Why do you think I came back here with you instead of running in to help everyone else?
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[He sighs, slumping a bit on himself.]
Because Dad wanted me to be the leader. And that kinda stuff is what Raph would've done.
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his previous least favorite thing about his brother has been usurped by another, and donnie despises it.] You don't get it.
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Then. [A little huff of a sigh as he looks down at his phone, those two new icons on his home screen meaning everything to him right now.
He's supposed to be listening to his team. Listening to his family. So... Why is it so hard to?]
Then. Explain it to me? [If nothing else, he sounds earnest.]
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but there's just. something in the way; not pride. no, maybe-]
...I know...you're good. We all know it. You're not Raph, but you don't need to be. [rubs at his eye again, though at least it seems like that humiliating leaking has stopped for now. god, he hates this so damn much. his emotions always just come in this irritatingly incoherent bursts instead of just. flowing like normal, like how mikey does it. it makes it so hard to explain himself without some kind of soul-crushing event first.] I'm not worried about you. I'm worried about you worrying about me.
[oh.
it's shame.] I don't have the Donnie Pods. I don't have my lab, any of my tech, any powers...I don't even have my battle shell. I know if something happens to you, it'll be because you're... [sigh.] Because you're looking out for me.
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When Donnie's done, Leonardo watches his face before simply stretching out and laying his legs over his brother's, like Donnie's entire lap is a nice leg pillow.]
I'm going to be looking out for you regardless of whatever we have or don't have available. I'm the older brother, and it's just us, so I'm gonna.
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